Currently, my mood is "get to work while the baby is sleeping." So I started a crockpot roast this for supper, emptied/loaded my dishwasher, started brainstorming ideas for this column, and now I'm typing away drinking my Sunday morning coffee. Usually we would be at church right now; however, Easton has a tiny bug so we are home letting him recover. I've been thinking of something that would be a topic of interest and one thing came to mind: the gift registry.
Going off on a tiny rabbit trail here. When you create your guest list, of course it is important to have addresses for RSVPs. It's also important for you to have them for Thank You cards as well!
One of my biggest flaws and a huge secret I have kept all these years is when I planned my own wedding four years ago, I had an awful time keeping track of this list I made. The list had on it the names of my family and friends who graciously sent Ryan and I wedding gifts. I believe I got at least half of them out before losing my list! That's right, you heard me! I made a mistake. We were in the process of moving into our new home (which we closed on a couple of days after returning from our honeymoon.) I was so upset when this happened, and wouldn't you know, I just found it the other day. Rummaging through boxes of papers and cards, there it was staring back at me. I felt a horrible sense of guilt and really wanted to send them out. But I felt that it would be tacky at this point. "Hey here's your thank you card from almost four years ago. By the way, how's the family!?" Of course I wouldn't write that in the card, but I felt that's how it would look to the recipient. So I decided against it. Hopefully the people that didn't receive a card from me hold no ill will. It really was an honest mistake. But I am telling you this now so that you can do a better job than I did before becoming a wedding planner even crossed my mind. So rule of thumb, when you get a gift, have a small notebook handy that you can jot down the name of the person who gave it to you + the type of gift it was. I've done much better with my baby gift thank you cards!
So, moving forward.
Since I spent some time in my kitchen this morning, I started seeing some things we had put on our online wedding registries that people had gotten for us, and I decided to make that my topic for this week. Now of course if this is your first marriage (It happens. Some people get married more than once), you really do have a lot to think of purchasing to make it an easy transition for you and your spouse as you begin your lives together. Although in this day and age, couples are waiting longer to get married- usually the bride and groom are in their late 20's or early 30's. Careers happen, people want to make money, travel, and be independent for a while! So most of the time when this is the case, you already have some of the things you need to live on your own. So what do you need to expect from your guests when building your wedding registry?
1. People don't always buy from it. You sometimes will have guests, especially those without internet, to purchase items they think you need or want, even if it isn't on the registry. We've all had it happen. If you don't need it, don't tell them that. They just wanted to give you something they thought would be helpful or useful. Just take it with a smile, and if you don't need it, there is always the option of regifting or exchanging it if they gave you a receipt. Still be gracious!
2. Sometimes, you will get doubles! You will have two of the same thing. This might have been useful on Noah's Arc, but of course you don't need two toasters, or two sets of silverware (although really great if you plan to have a large family!)
3. Guests will regift. Even some of your guests still have that extra crockpot or can opener laying around in their kitchen collecting dust. Or that afghan that just doesn't go with their decor.
4. Sometimes, you won't like what you get. But that's the beauty of free will. You don't have to use it or keep it, just be kind and appreciative regardless.
5. People will just come to your wedding for the food, drinks, and the cake... Some won't bring a gift at all. These people aren't uncaring, they just like showing up to the party. You'll have that, but it'll be fine because then you can do the same when they get married!!! (SN: That is a joke. I don't condone the 'eye for an eye' mentality.)
